Things I Eat: When Out

Oh, food. 

So, what happens when you have to eat out? Well, a lot of fear happens. Planning normally reduces my anxiety - and potential for massive gut issues - so I like it when there are reservations and an email address to contact the restaurant.

What? Contact a restaurant?! Yep. I don't know why more people don't do this. A lot of people show up and start throwing out situations at the poor server who then scrambles around. . .sad. Sad. Let 'em know you're coming!

What Really Sucks
Sure, I have a couple spots I go and eat if eating out is proposed on the fly.

Work dinners or lunches are about the worst because eating is hard and I don't want to be "high-maintenance" in front of work people. I also don't want to overwhelm the server or the poor chef. They are freaking busy enough.

To be honest, most of the time, I sit and watch people eat. I try to have a drink with me or something. But, most of the time, it's the only thing I feel safe doing. It makes me an object of a lot of mockery. I believe I have only had one person every apologize for being insensitive after saying, "I wish I had a food allergy, then I could lose weight!"

To an extent, I have bowed out of work-eating functions.

What Works
Ok, so, reservations are made. The first thing I do is get the details of the reservation as to what name the party is under. It's important. Then I contact the restaurant with an email like this:

Hello! 

I will be part of the _____ party on _____ . 

I have a couple food issues and I just wanted to just make sure there was something I could eat - I am totally fine with a salad or anything. I just wanted to check in advance so I don't cause any problems by unloading a list of issues to the poor server. :) 

Also, my issues will not cause me to go into some type death - I'm not super concerned with cross contamination for one meal. It's a digestive issue not something that will require an epi-pen.(Thank God).
I cannot have:

• Dairy
• Eggs
• Soy
• Wheat
• Canola
• Yeast (vinegar, etc)
• Beans
• Pepper (black/white)
• Cranberry
• Mushrooms 

(Yes, I'm a disaster). 

Any guidance as to what would be "safe" would be great! 

Thanks so, so much,
Amanda

I like to get this email out a week before, at least. Just to give the restaurant a chance to respond. I'm sure they are busy and I'm not an easy type person to deal with from a food standpoint or even a legal one (a lot of restaurants worry about this more than anything). That's why I am sure to put in the extent of my allergy and my fear of cross-contamination (low). Crap is going to get into my food, I know this and just need to mitigate the risk. I won't die in the restaurant. I won't hold them to some super-high standard. I just want to know what is safe and create some awareness. Point me in the right direction!

In the two places I could do this with, both got back to me pretty quickly with suggestions and tagged me in that party so someone could come talk to me. I actually hate when someone comes to talk to me about this - but I also hate pink and facilitating conference calls.

So far, the best place EVER was Paramour - they actually created their daily special around the foods I could eat. WHAT?! I could order "the special" and. . .man, that was awesome. Even to think, the chef actually created a dish for me. I had a chef created a dish for me. And. It. Was. AWESOME. I felt like a normal person - sitting there saying, "I'll have the special, thanks!" What a joy. And the food was super good.

At White Dog, they sent me a special allergy menu (WHAT? Awesome!) which listed some things. The problem here is I don't do the trendy, "Mm, no gluten, please." I have a lot more to avoid.

And the person who replied to my email gave me some tips and pointers. She also suggested I just order some plain grilled chicken. The only issue she saw was pepper. Even at these "organic" and "Wholesome" restaurants, they get their food pre-seasoned and packaged.

They can't prevent that or what goes into their food.

Did you know that? Yeah. I did. I learned it the hard way. Things are prepackaged for cost and efficiency - the chef isn't back there (normally) with all desperate and raw ingredients.

My husbands favorite place, The Keg, had someone come out and talk to me and let me know they would remove the grill base or something from my food. It was one of those "prepackage" deal things I wouldn't have known about. It was super awesome, and I appreciated the attitude of the lady who talked to me and reassured me I wasn't a pain. The two Old Fashions I had also helped.

Conclusions
I don't like to eat out. When I do, I have to plan to have some eating-rest days to give my system some time to recover. I easily can see the bloating when I eat some of the stuff I can't have - and it only gets worse after that.

So, take aways - if you have different, special or whatever needs, just let the restaurant know. Play it safe, don't assume.