Dec 26, 2016

Things I Eat: Chicken Thighs with Fig-Garlic Sauce

That's right. I cook.

If you're new here, which is unlikely, you can find a whole series of post I did about Things I Eat because I can't eat a lot of foods that most people can eat.

I can't go out to eat to much unless I want an iffy-salad, I can't even go to family functions and eat well when people home-cook stuff.

Sure, eating potatoes while everyone else enjoys a wide variety of delicious foods is really great. So great. Just, everything is great.

Everyone: So, you can eat something here right?
Me: Sure*
Everyone: Oh good, you have a salad.
Me: It's yummy**

* No and go f**k yourself
** I am so emotionally and physically unsatisfied by this dumb, dull bed of iceburg lettuce that costs $20 that I want you to go f**k yourself

But, I totally digress. Let's talk about this Chicken Thighs with Fig-Garlic Sauce with mashed acorn squash.

Ingredients

  • Chicken thighs: I got skin-on, bone-in chicken thighs. I like dark meat. It's flavorful. People try to feed me white meat all the time like it's exciting. Yeeeah. . .dry, roasted, dry meat, oh, you put butter on it? Sure, I can eat around that. 
  • Fig preserves: I wanted to get plum, actually. Make a plum sauce, but, no plum. Plum is out of season, anyway. Yeah, foods tend to grow in seasons. Fast food is not a grown food.
  • Onions: Nom. . nomnomnom 
  • Chicken broth: Just a little moisture.
  • Acorn squash: We had one left over from our fall decor. Yes, you can eat your decor. 
  • Garlic: You are going to want to use more garlic powder than garlic cloves for this thing. Garlic powder is less likely to burn where raw garlic will - just trust me.
  • Cloves: Ground cloves, just a touch. Cloves are pretty strong and will overpower anything.
  • Onion powder: You know. . .for stuff. 
  • Ginger: I used powdered because I don't have time for your freshness.
  • Salt: Whatever. 
  • Olive oil or bacon grease


What You Do
You can make these both at the same time, I did start with the acorn squash. You half the squash, remove the seeds and some of the stringy stuff. Then get a glass baking pan, put water in it to cover the bottle and place the acorn squash in face down. Then put that in the over at 350 degrees for about 30-45 minutes. If you forget, whatever. You just want the insides nice and soft. You can flip them and cook them a little longer. I don't think I did that. I was drunk. Anyhow, once it's soft, add a little clove and maybe a touch of Earth Balance Soy Free Fake Butter or oil of your choice. Then mash it up and add some salt or whatever. You keep it mashed in it's skin for a nice boat presentation.

Presentation is ok
Let's chat chicken. 

Yes, I wish I could be vegan. I so wish I could be vegan. Or eat eggs. 

I used our cast-iron skillet that my husband got me for my birthday. I know what he was thinking I just don't know what he was thinking. It's cool, marriage is fun and easy. 

I used four chicken thighs! You can use olive oil for a little fun. You can also use bacon grease. I used both. It didn't matter as much as I thought. 

Anyhow, heat up your pan so it's nice and hot and salt your chicken thighs while it warms. Use a little more salt than you might think you want to use. A lot will render off, which is good.

Drop the thighs skin side down. It should sizzle. Keep your stove at about half power. . .not on high. Just a nice, medium, even heat. Keep it on that side for 7 minutes then gently turn them. They should all brown and delicious. If they are not brown enough, you can keep them on longer. Don't be a slave to the clock, man.

OOOOHHH YEEEAH
Do the same on the other side. If you think you are getting some stickage, turn down the heat or add a little touch of chicken broth or extra oil. Anyhow, after another 7 minutes, remove them onto a plate somewhere. Throw in your onions and garlic and a little chicken broth. 

I don't suggest using a lot of powder right away, just let the onions get all sweaty and soft and delicious. If you are really smart, you would have chopped the onions rather than just sliced them like I did.

You know what? You can do you. If you want chunky sauce, you use large slices. If you want minced onion, you do that. If you start chunky and want smooth, get a blender. Do you.

Delicious
Once your onion is all cooked how you like it, add some of your chicken broth and fig preserves. I used this Bonne Maman brand because every other brand I came across had vinegar in it. That's right, your jams, jellys and preserves have yeast in them and I can't have yeast. Bet'ch didn't know that. This is why I can't trust.

Anyhow, this sh** is delicious.


I used about three table spoons and then a lot of powdered ginger and powdered garlic. Here is where I panicked, I was looking at the chicken and I was like "Dude, I don't have enough" and then I put in more fig preserves and then it seemed too sweet. Really, you are going to be cooking this and seasoning to taste. But, it will be diluted over your chicken.

Keep this sauce in your pan so it's all saucey and then, if you are like. . ."I want it smooth" maybe you put it in a food processor. Either way, put your chicken with the sauce back in your pan and finish the cooking of the chicken.

I served it raw and had to come back and recook it. I was drunk.

Anyhow, yeah, you're going to cook it for another 5-and-5 on each side. Check to make sure it is cooked or the internal temp is 165–175°F (74-80°C)


I thought the picture looked a little bland, so, I threw some fresh parsley over it. Parsley is delicious.

I made a little romaine and pepper salad and dinner was served! I was so excited, I didn't even focus the photo.


Thoughts
This was fracking better the next day. I left myself a piece. Yum.

Anyhow, I was worried about the sweetness, but, it was totally fine with the fatty-salty chicken. This was actually super easy and if I ever find plum preserves, I will be trying that.

Most people don't understand how well meat and fruit go together. Most of our American meat is served with vegetables or a more salty-savory blend of seasoning. Try some chicken and fruit or chicken and cinnamon. It's delicious.

Food is awesome.

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Dec 23, 2016

Blog Update

So, here's how this blog stuff is going down.

You're getting one post from me a week. Unless I suddenly develop and exciting life and the inner desire to write about it.

This way, at least things will be consistent, right?

Does anyone even read this? Naaa. . .

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Dec 16, 2016

Writing Update: December

Some of my absence has been due to me trying to continue writing my series the Calpurnia Mission.

Let me give you the counts:

  1. The Calpurnia Mission: 9,298 words
  2. The Rebel Lion: 13,360 words
  3. Between Life and Dark: 12,480 words
  4. The Stark Truth: 14,978 words
  5. Of Haves and Wants: 30,516 words
  6. Safe Harbor: 15,799 words
  7. Rebel Valley: 26,781 words
  8. Of the Best Intentions: 15,724 words
  9. Eight o' Clock: 19,395 words
  10. Underground: 17,944 words
  11. Salon des Refues: 15,338 words
  12. Into the Smoke: 12,273 words
  13. The Human Twist: 18,817 words
  14. The Pitch Black: 13,166 words
  15. Den of Foxes: 11,272 words
  16. The Sky Lure: 7,124 words
  17. The Body Thief: 12,082 words
  18. Unknown: 200 words. . .?
So that's 243,885 words total. I originally assumed this would be about 30 chapters, so. . yep. There is that.

General Updates

I missed finishing a story in October. I really lost it in October with writing. And even November. It just got a lot harder to come up with ideas. I think I lost a lot of where I wanted to go. I also introduced two new characters in Den of Foxes which left me sort of. .arrrrggg. .because everyone else is more well-developed and characters can take a little time to create. It's important to me characters have their own motivation and voices - and their own actions with different people.

I also ran out of short-story ideas, since each is generally a short story. Although, I also feel as if I lost some of that series fiction type stuff from before. Oh well. I mean. . .stuff.

ALSO. . .The Body Thief is mostly erotic fiction and I don't know how to feel about that for the following reasons:

  • Does it make sense for the characters: Sure, I think I did a good job making it seem plausable. Did I build the situation up enough that it seems logical? Maybe.
  • Porn:. . .*giggle*. . .*snort*. . .I'm not mature enough to deal with this.

Forward Thinking
I think I have some concepts and bits set up for Chapter 18. I'm just not sure. I want to return to the style of the series which I think I got away from because I had to build up characters independently and create their own story lines. Now I got to sandwich them back together and keep the hunt going.


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Dec 14, 2016

Pantless Wednesday: Taydey Midi Dress

I can't number these posts anymore. Seriously. I'm just going to name them.

ANYHOW. . .I got this number from Amazon - as is my way. This is the Taydey Women's Midi Dresses Sleeveless Knee Length Party Evening Dress.



It's basically a pencil dress with some texture. Some of the name is a lie - it has cap sleeves and with a blazer looks fine in the office. That's how I wore it.

It's actually sort of thin and the texture is kind of cool.



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Dec 12, 2016

Halloween 2016

Halloween 2016 shaped up to be one of my favorites so far. I am currently planning for 2017, but, I digress.

Let's get into what I did for Halloween 2016 and how you, noble citizen, could also get the same look. Just, don't look at prices because. .DAMN. And by "damn" I mean, I did spend a bit of money but I had money left over from last year. Also, I spent no money on two other costumes I needed in October. . .

Vex the Satyr
I decided to be a satyr. It had been a long time since I had been a fancy creature and I really like to have stuff on my head - like horns. Per Wiki:

A satyr is one of a class of lustful, drunken woodland gods. In Greek art they were represented as a man with a horse's ears and tail, but in Roman representations as a man with a goat's ears, tail, legs, and horns.
Sounds like a fun time! I named my satyr Vex. Because. . .whatever. I later used that as a character name in one of my stories.

Here is an example of a female satyr from Wiki


Boobs.

Thoughts
Early thoughts were really around what type of horns I wanted. I was thinking faun, then I was like, naaa, ram.

I also decided I would stick to a rusty almost steampunk type theme. It has also been a while since I have been "sexy" and I thought maybe doing some type of cool and sexy pieces would be just the kick I needed to get some attention before twisting the view into fear or repulsion. Although, I wanted all this to be subtle - nothing bloody or weird. Just subtle and one solid.

My first and really only disappointment was the $200-$1,000,000,000 price tag on satyr feet. You know, the cloven hoof type look. You can check out Chaos Costumes for what I was eyeing. I couldn't really afford that. Or the. . .other ones. Whatever.

Total Body Shot
Let's get the whole look over with before I break it down.


I didn't have any really good full body shots, so, deal.

Hair
I kept my natural hair but added in some red, clip in extensions. It took me maybe two tries to get them in really good. And now I really like extensions and I want more.

These red ones added some needed length and color and looked good with my hair color for a contrast. I could have gotten more, but, good enough.

I got the AGPtek 26" Enstyle Supreme Neon Tangle Curly Hair Extension Ponytail-wine red to dark red.

This is not real hair or anything, but, I was happy with them.

Face
Makeup in a moment. I got a nose ring for this with skulls because I wanted it to stand out against my black nose paint. I found the ring uncomfortable for about 10 minutes and then it was not a problem at all. It was so impressed.

 I totally will be wearing this again. And a lot of people thought it was real. Nope. I mean, I guess a septum piercing is pretty easy to fake, so. Take that.

I got the Linked Skulls Fake Non Piercing Clip On Septum Hanger Silver Tone

Arms
I knew I needed to get some bad-ass tats for this. I don't actually know how bad-ass I am or how these tats looked but I was SO impressed with how long they stayed on.


I had one on as a test for about 2 weeks and only toward the end did it start to look a little worn and flaky when you really looked at it. They went on easy with the water and stuff. I just really sucked at putting them on straight. Whatever.

The pack I really liked was the Generic Black Lace Temporary Tattoos for Adventurous Women, Teens & Girls - Henna Tattoos Sticker W306-311.

I also wore a lot of rings. They I just had. You know, recycle.

Torso
I got myself this Charmian Women's Spiral Steel Boned Steampunk Gothic Bustier Corset with Chains for an AMAZING $30 or so. It's so much nicer than a $30 corset. I played around with getting something with shoulders, but, I don't have the torso for something that covers my shoulders. It makes me look weird.
I also got this Faux Fur Bolero Jacket Fox because it is October in PA and it can be cold. Nice to have something warm and I thought I might be able to wear it again. I also wanted something kind of animal like.


Below. . .
I got myself three items for below my waist. *sizzle* - the first thing I was a little unhappy with and that was the Dikoaina Women Girls Sexy Solid Color Bandage Mesh Leggings because I thought the bandage pattern would go all the way around. Ends up, the bandage part is only on the front and the back is a solid piece of fabric. If you are super skinny, you wouldn't notice - the model was skinny. 




But, the worked because you didn't see the back of my legs because I was wearing this Steampunk Victorian Gothic Womens Costume Show Girl Skirt which has a feature where you can hike it up in the front or let it go long. Super quality. I was very happy with it.





I hiked it up so you could see my fur and boots! I wore some normal brown fur boot covers - totally easy to find for Halloween - over my Bumper EB16 Women Lycra Over The Knee Almond Toe Pyramid Studded Metal Heel Platform Boot - Cognac.



And there you have it! Halloween 2016 purchases, DONE!


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Nailed to the Couch: Black Matte

I have been searching for a black matte nail polish because I think it looks good. My man-husband is not a fan of black nail polish because he says it reminds him of goth stuff. And I guess he doesn't like goth style. You know, to each their own.

Anyhow, since I could not find a black matte polish in the grocery store - where I get all my stuff - I was going to. . .uhh. . continue looking.
The item

What I did find was Matte About You - Top Coats by Essie! I happen to be a fan of Essie. If you ever saw any of my beautiful nail air featuring an occasional accent nail and tons of varnish all over my dry, cracked cuticles.

The first thing I did notice about this top coat, because it is a top coat - or "taco" per that Christine chick on Simply Nailogical - got some serious packaging. I mean, did we need all that packaging?

Anyhow, I had Essie's Licorice which is a pretty sweet black. It's also very glossy.

I added this matte coat and - SHAAZA! Look at that action! I will also say, I don't often use a top coat and I found this made my polish last longer. Which is. . .I guess the point.


Anyhow, I am thrilled with this find because I can now turn any polish I have into a matte. I also picked up a normal top coat for glossy. I think the matte looks best on dark colors but I can wait to try more!

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Dec 1, 2016

ALIVE

Nope, I'm still here. I have just been investing more time in writing my series fiction (No, I didn't do NoWoNovemberswrittingthing) I just write.

I also have been doing more voiceover stuff - not the paid kind, just the time consuming kind.

And. . .uhh. . not doing anything here. I've really not being doing anything here. Super not.

Ok, I AM going to start getting my act together.

Promise.

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Sep 7, 2016

Pantsless Wednesday: Post 8

Another fantastic #PantslessWednesday! Let's get it going with today's number.


This Gabby Skye Women's Short Sleeve Stripe Fit and Flare Dress in sapphire and black. And here is what it looks like on a model. It's pretty flattering and I am a big fan of Gabby Skye.

Do you pantsless?

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Aug 24, 2016

Pantsless Wednesday: Post 7

Time for some color! I got this from Mod Cloth - it is the Campfire Walk With Me Dress and my Steve Madden purple pumps - newly repaired!


Remember, it's Pantsless Wednesday - drop your pants, not my expectations.

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Aug 10, 2016

Maddy-Monster: Do Good

Just a message


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Pantsless Wednesday: Post 6

Sometimes, a nice vintage splash of flowers is just what is needed. And, of course, my purple Steve Madden pumps (I had to get them repaired because I wore them so much!)

This dress is from Black Butterfly Clothing - the company takes vintage styles and trends (let's say, 1940-1950) and updates them a little.

This dress is the "Audrey" and the first dress I got from this company. It is so nice! I love this pattern! Lined, little puff to the skirt (not too much) and I paired it with my purple pumps and a black blazer here at work.


I got this dress as a birthday present for myself back in 2014, I believe.

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Aug 3, 2016

Texts With Melissa: Shoes

I moved from a very ritzy area of the world, and only about 3 miles from my parents, to a up-and-coming area about 30 minutes away from my parents. The results were a bit of a larger disconnect which I struggled to understand and figure out.


Let's review what is really important in life. 


Follow more inspiration at Texts with Melissa.

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Texts With Melissa: Reactions

Melissa knows all the weird sheet I do. I still feel the need to let her know how my behavior is still bizarre.


That bar aisle is pretty awesome - that's where I get my Go Macro bars. Let's break down the magic of friendship!


You got it.


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Jul 27, 2016

Pantsless Wednesday: Post 5

Another #PantslessWednesday! Working hard in this "famous" dress that my hubs loves because of this photo:


I later printed it out and autographed it for him. Because I'm vain. And he had a coupon.

This dress is still going strong.



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Jul 20, 2016

Maddy-Monster: Not Forever

Listen, sometimes things are not the easiest to handle. Sometimes things are really dark.


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Jul 18, 2016

You Are Not Helping

That one time I needed answers....


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Jul 13, 2016

Pantsless Wednesday: Post 4

How about some spots? And a spot of red?


This little number I got from Amazon, of course. But, more specifically, it is Jessica Howard Women's Cap Sleeve Belted Dress with a pair of kitten-heel red pointy shoes. These are not my favorite shoes. . but I love the color.

This is what  model looks like in it.




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